The New Hire
by BlairCorneliaBass
Summary: What happens to Bass Industries with the addition of a new blonde secretary? ... CB, I swear....


A/N: Ok, so this one was born from those gossip girl posts saying how Chuck and Blair weren't seen together at all over the summer (you can find them here: .com/?m=200909). Anyway, it didn't really make sense to me, so I made up this situation.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, obviously.

**The New Hire**

"Hey- did you see the new secretary, man?"

Chuck Bass was simply getting a cup of coffee for himself. Yes, at the common little bar they had for all employees at Bass Industries. He could have just asked for someone else to get it, but he needed a break from his office. So he got it for himself.

Of course, he hadn't counted on the inane chit chat of stupid middleclass white collar workers surrounding him. Particularly the two douche bags whose pathetic cubicles were right by the coffee bar.

"Aw fuck yeah, man. The blonde, right?" Butthead continued on his conversation with Beavis.

"Yeah, that's the one. With that juicy little ass."

_Danger. Danger. _It was going off like a warning bell in Chuck's head. He had been completely monogamous to Blair ever since they'd gotten together a few weeks ago. Most often, he didn't even notice other women because his eyes were only for her now. _But_, he knew better than to get into temptation.

In fact, he would just leave now before he heard any more.

"Too bad she's Bass' new secretary."

Chuck froze in his steps.

"So?" Shithead number one queried.

"So, I asked Marie about it and she can only do jobs for Mr. Bass," Shithead number two sighed wistfully.

"Oh I can think of some _jobs_ I'd like her to do for me."

Chuck Bass was pissed. He knew they were going to hire him a new secretary. Ann, the secretary who'd worked with his father for years, had left for her honeymoon the week before and wouldn't be returning for two months. They had interviewed some girls in the meantime, but Chuck had had to turn them down, knowing that Blair would be unhappy should any of them be chosen. They had all been standard Barbie dolls and with about the same mental capacities.

So _why_ had they hired someone new behind his back? He had given strict instructions that he was supposed to have final approval for the hiring of the new secretary.

"Please. This is Chuck Bass we're talking about here. You know he'll get to her first."

"Yeah, and the next day he'll be on to someone else. And she'll be in need of _comfort_..."

Ugh, these fourteen year-old virgins were really annoying him. And damn it, this wouldn't be a problem if he and Blair had just come out officially! But no, she said that she didn't want the big hoopla that Gossip Girl would be posting if they were seen all the time together. With Serena and Nate gone in Europe, Chuck and Blair's every move would have been documented all summer. _"Every week they'd be posting some imaginary argument we'd have or something. We'd be the next Brad and Angelina!"_ she had insisted.She said she wanted a quiet, peaceful summer with Chuck Bass all to herself before the drama of college started.

And it had all been well and good until this little complication.

"Well as long as she keeps walking by in those short skirts and fucking kitten high heels, I'll be having sweet dreams tonight."

"And the glasses, man- those hot librarian glasses. Damn, I bet she's a minx in the sack."

Ok, he was leaving. No more about secretaries, or high heels, or... _librarian_ _glasses_-

No! He wasn't even horny; he and Blair had been at it all night last night- he was fairly certain that there were no liquids left in his body. And there was no woman worth sleeping with if it meant losing Blair.

He closed the door and once again found himself in the calming confines of his office. Safe at last.

His eyes came across the pile of papers on his desk and he groaned. This was definitely the downside of not having a secretary, he had so much extra work to do walked over and sat down with a sigh. He would have to talk to Marie later about the new secretary.

Five minutes later his solitude was disrupted again.

"Mr. Bass?" Arthur Porter, one of the board members poked his head in.

"Yes?"

"Sorry to bother you, but we needed your approval on some of the proposals," he quibbled, looking slightly afraid.

Chuck sighed as he stood up. It was going to be a long day, he could tell. Although he was extremely grateful that his credibility with the board members had drastically changed ever since he took over the company from Lily. He had a suspicious feeling that _she'd_ had a lot to do with that, but he wasn't about to be ungrateful. She still gave him her advice when he needed it for business matters.

Arthur led him to one of the corner offices to look over the paperwork. Everything looked good and he was about to say so, until a small commotion outside of the hall drew their attention.

They both looked through the clear window wall to see hundreds of papers strewn about the floor, with a slender blonde woman at the epicenter.

"Oh dear," Arthur chuckled, shaking his head slightly. "That should be your new secretary. Marie gave her some jobs to keep her busy this morning, just to test her out, you know. And I can't say that she's the most competant, but the other board members and I are all rather..." he cocked his head to the side as he watched the blonde secretary bend over-" _fond_ of her."

Chuck tried not to watch. He really did.

But the truth was she _did_ have an extremely juicy ass. And long, long legs strapped in fucking red kitten heels...

Arthur looked at Chuck out of the corner of his eyes. "Do you think you'll be keeping this one?" he whispered almost pleadingly.

Chuck grimaced, turning his eyes back to the paperwork. "I sincerely doubt it," he muttered before taking a deep breath. "This looks fine, Arthur. Now if you don't mind, I really need to get back to my office." With that he walked away, staying clear of the hallway with the new secretary.

Chuck closed the door of his office behind him and once again settled into work. He was not going to think about the blonde woman. He hadn't even seen her face- her back had been turned towards them the entire time. He bet she had a really fugly face, haggard, with pock marks all over. With such a face, who cared that she had the most luscious ass, and legs that had gone on for days in that short skirt of hers...

No, no, she had to go and after he did some work to clear his head, he would get Marie and have her fire the girl immediately. He had no idea why this one was such a temptation anyway; he hadn't had a reaction like this with any of the others.

Once again, Chuck Bass was only afforded five minutes of peace before his door opened again.

"Well, I expect you to know how a copier should be run- these are basic skills for a secretary," Marie was saying in an annoyed voice as she walked into the room. Her head was turned to the girl behind her, obstructing her face, but Chuck looked down quickly at his paperwork again so that he couldn't see.

Marie came right up to his desk. "Mr. Bass. I know you want final approval on all of the candidates for your new secretary, so let me introduce to you-"

"Miss Audrey Kelly," the secretary interjected in a deliberate voice.

Chuck Bass stared at the papers in front of him in confusion for a prolonged second. He knew that voice, he had known it all his life, he had heard it moaning his name not six hours ago.

He slowly raised his head. High-waisted black skirt cinching a tiny waist, white chiffon blouse with elegant ruffles along the neckline, blonde curls piled in a classy updo, and black cat-eye librarian glasses perched on a pert nose. But behind the glasses, Blair Waldorf's chocolate brown eyes sparkled wickedly back at him.

At first he could only gape like the bass fish his surname was before a slow grin stole across his face.

He put out a hand. "Miss-?"

"Kelly," she supplied in an innocent voice, placing her hand in his. "But you can call me Audrey, Mr. Bass."

He brought the back of her hand to his lips. "Pleasure to meet you, Audrey," he whispered.

Marie looked a little shocked, glancing between the two. Mr. Bass had never reacted to any of the candidates in such a manner. Why did it have to be this one that he suddenly approved?

"Mr. Bass," she walked over to his side of the desk and pulled him aways. "If I might have a word with you."

Whe he finally tore his eyes from the secretary, Marie began her whisper rant. "Really Mr. Bass, she's the most incompetant of all the girls we've interviewed. She didn't know how to use a copier; I doubt she knows how to use a stapler! And she has the most haughty attitude I've ever seen for someone in such a lowly position- you have no idea the _looks_ she's given me all morning, and I-" she took a deep breath to steady herself. "I simply cannot recommend her."

Chuck turned to look at Blair, who was innocently inspecting her nails, before she raised her gaze to meet his and smirked widely.

He smirked back before turning back to Marie with a politely puzzled brow. "I really don't know what you mean, Marie. It appears to me that Audrey will be an excellent addition to the Bass company here." He frowned slightly at her. "I think you need to learn to put more faith in people, Marie."

Marie looked puzzled herself as she found herself being walked out the door by Mr. Bass.

"Now if you'll excuse us, I'd like to get a little more acquianted with Miss Kelly. _Privately_." He winked at her just as he closed the door in her face.

"This is what I get for working for Chuck Bass," Marie whispered to the empty hallway.

Chuck turned back to the woman standing just before his office desk with a smirk.

"Audrey, huh?" he asked as he stalked over to her.

She shrugged lightly. "Need I even explain? The Kelly comes from Grace Kelly."

"Of course," he agreed as she wrapped her arms around his neck and he slipped his arms around her waist. "And what exactly prompted this foray into secretarial work?"

"Well, you were hiring, and I hear that Bass Industries has incredibly good work benefits," she whispered against his lips.

"Mmm, especially when you work right _under_ the boss," he supplied, running a finger down the curves in her blouse.

"And," she breathed, threading her fingers through his hair. "Even if Gossip Girl thinks I'm cooped up in my house all day, doesn't mean I actually have to be."

"Very true," he agreed, kissing along the column of her throat, enjoying the moans that it illicited from her throat.

"And," she continued in a slightly incoherent voice, sliding a leg up to wrap around his waist. "I decided that eight hours everyday without you was just unbearable."

She brought his lips to hers then in a searing kiss. The room was filled with shallow panting before he spoke again.

"The hair's not real is it?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Of course not. Like I would ever give up my chestnut curls for wimpy blondeness. It's just a wig."

He smiled and slid off her spectacles. "And the librarian outfit?"

She smiled back as she began untying his tie. "I figured you had some kind of fetish for nerds."

He jerked her skirt up, uncovering that juicy ass of hers. "Strong-willed, bossy bitch ones, yes."

She smacked his arm. "I am not a nerd!"

He began pulling down her stockings slowly. "_You_ are the sexiest, most adorable, bitchiest nerd I've ever seen." He kissed the tip of her nose. "And I only have a fetish for you."

"Oh really?" she asked, forcefully pulling out the buttons on his shirt, before whispering in his ear. "Would a nerd tell you to fuck her on your office desk?"

"Minx," he muttered before closing his mouth over hers once again.

It was only a minute or two before his body stilled and a murderous expression came over his face.

"Chuck?" Blair asked in confusion.

He extricated himself reluctantly from her limbs. "Excuse me. I have two perverted douche bags to go fire."

A/N: I'm not sure if I'm going to keep this as a one-shot or multi-chaptered fic. Basically, if I get inspiration for more, I will definitely post.


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